Teaching Children In Love Part 3

A friend and her daughter were visiting me at mysomething that is causing stress or discomfort to
apartment. In the front entrance of the buildingsomething that is joyful, they will immediately feel
there is a high stoop, about one foot high in anbetter. If something is overwhelming to them,
area. The little girl assessed the place, and decidedhelp them to break it down into smaller units. Just
to jump. The way she had jumped caused her tobecause they have a thought about something
fall forward and down right on her face. Once Idoesn't mean that the thought can't be changed
knew that she was okay, I started to quietlyor adjusted.
speak to the little girl about her landing, so thatOpen communication: Children feel most
she could do it better the next time. Her mother,comfortable when they can talk about what they
freaked out, and was screaming at me for lettingare feeling or thinking about any subject. Nothing
her, picked up her daughter, and wiped away theshould be off limits, they should be able to ask
blood, and was putting out all sorts of negativequestions, and get solid answers, they should be
thoughts and creating more fear in her daughter.able to tell you anything without punishment, and
My friend left us for a moment, and I talked tolet you know about something that is happening
the little girl. "to them, without being afraid, or disturbed that
You know, I saw what you had tried to do, Youyou will be upset with them or that you will not
were very brave, I know that you got a littlelove them. Sometimes the time and place for
scared, but it was a good try, next time youdiscussion is not appropriate, but as soon as you
have to make sure that you clear the wall withare able, take them to a safe and quiet place and
your feet, and get your feet underneath you, solet them talk. Let them know that you are going
that you land on your feet." She looked at meto listen to them fully at that time. Make a
with peaceful understanding, and a newcommitment and do so.
awareness. She knew that I was not upset at herRespect: You teach respect to children by
for trying something new, and I was giving her aexample. If you don't want to be laughed at for
tool so that she would not get hurt again whenyour thoughts or your actions, don't laugh at
she tried it after that. Right there I knew she gotthem and don't mock them, be careful of your
it.words. Don't call them stupid, an idiot, or
Managing thoughts: To cope, children also need tounintelligent. Remember they are just a reflection
know how to manage their thoughts. Let themof what they were taught, and what they
know that by changing their focus, fromlearned.