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How Not To Get Published

How  Not  To  Get  Publishedreally it's a bitsad. People who have the
story--the part that can't belearned--but
tell it badly. They rush in on the
adrenalinehigh that authors know so well,
If someone had told me in 2000 that I'dthen  get  rejected  and  give  up.
publish  four  books  in
What defines a great story? That depends on
2001,  I'd  have  called  him  an  eejit.which reader youask. If you're writing a
story that moves you, someonesomewhere with
The last time I'd been published was 1989,similar tastes will like it. Some stories
and that doesn'tcount because I paid someonewillbe more popular than others, but almost
to do it. I'd long since given upon gettingevery story will beconsidered great by
published again. In fact, I doubted I'd eversomeone. But if it's badly written, thereader
writeagain.will simply put the book down and read
something  else.
By now you may wonder how I made it from
Point  A  to  Point  B.As a teenaged author, gathering up enough
rejection slips towallpaper the room, I
Or  for  that  matter, why I stopped writing.didn't give up. I just got arrogant
anddecided "You don't understand me, ya
The second part is simple. I was chasingeejit." That's nosolution. Nor is paying to
money, becoming ahigh-powered businessman andbe  published.
losing myself. The first part isa little more
difficult  to  explain.Nope, if you want to get published, learn how
to tell yourstory. Spelling, grammar,
In December 1999, I flew to Hong Kong for apunctuation, pacing, dialogue... allthat
vacation. Thefirst vacation in my life,stuff you may have slept through in high
really. I intended to stay for amonth.school will becomesecond nature with enough
Instead, I married an Australian who taughtpractice.
English  there.
I did quite well in high school English, by
I  quit  my  job  in North Carolina by email.the way, but it'snot like they taught pacing
and dialogue and real story-telling there. To
I found myself unable to legally work in Honglearn those, you've gotta read. But that's
Kong.  So  what  wasnoproblem for an author. If you don't enjoy
reading, you can'twrite something that others
I to do with my time? I dusted off awill  enjoy  reading.
childhood  dream  and  resumedwriting.
Also, you must listen to the criticisms.
I had a slush pile full of old short stories,Accept some andreject others, but always
and I ran themthrough the on-line writinglisten. I believe the Internet makesit much
workshops. There are two partseasier  to  get  those  criticisms.
towriting--story and style. I wasn't changing
my stories--they camefrom me and were what II work as an editor now, and one of my
wanted to write--but my style waspathetic.authors told me that hesees movies inside his
Style is also the part that can be learned.head. It shows in his writing! I don'twrite
So  I  did.that way, unfortunately, but I still know how
he  feels.
Then came something that amazed me. New
stories.  Mixing  with  theWhen "the Muse" pays me a visit, I've gotta
write it down asfast as it comes to me.
"writing culture" got my creative juicesThat's the one part that can't bepackaged,
flowing again. After allthose years. Bettertaught or mass-produced. That part comes from
than  ever,  in  fact.you,the author, and no one else can do it the
way  that  you  do.
Next, I published them. Between March and
December 2000, Ipublished twenty stories inKurt Vonnegut, whose works I greatly admire,
twenty different e-zines. I onlymade $6, butwrites onesentence at a time, and makes each
I was building my resume. I believed that Ione perfect before hebegins the next. But I
had ashort story anthology in me, and I'ddon't write like that, nor do most ofthe
decided to try publishingit. I felt I neededauthors I know. We just let it fly, then go
a  "track  record,"  so  I  got  one.back  and  fixit  later.
I also had a novel in my slush pile. ABut if you don't want to get published, don't
gripping imaginativestory, badly told. Butgo back and fixit. Pass that raw copy around
I'd finally learned about the craft,to your friends and family andlet them tell
thestructure, and the hard work that comesyou how wonderful it is for fear of hurting
after  that  originalflash  of  inspiration.yourfeelings. Then send it to the publishers
and collect therejection letters. That's what
You see where I'm leading by now. I wrote twoI did in my younger days, and Iwasn't
new novels, andsigned contracts to publishpublished.
all three novels plus the newshort story
collection  in  2001.It took me twenty years to learn my lesson.
It would genuinelymake me feel good to hear
It's a common sight among new writers, andthat most writers aren't takingquite so long.



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